Tuesday, December 18, 2012

stressing or serving?

When you are wide awake at 4:00 a.m. and you realize you have hives breaking out on your hands because you are stressing out over situations you cannot do anything about, or at least do anything about for at least another 6 hours, it's time for something to give.
This year has brought some big changes for me work wise. I absolutely love my job but it has tested me in ways I never thought possible. One thing it has done for sure is test my willingness to serve - am I happy to serve anyone and anywhere or do I only want to serve when it's convenient for me, when it fits nicely into my 9-5 schedule I've created for myself? Do I really feel like serving when it's a week before Christmas and I would rather be quietly shutting down at work and daydreaming about the scent of christmas cookies and the sight of soft twinkle lights by my tree at night? Ashamedly the answer is usually no, I don't feel like serving but then Christ quietly reminds me what my purpose here on earth is, and what the purpose of this Christmas season really is. Christmas is not for spending hour after hour indulging myself on whatever I feel like doing, but rather, it is about remembering the birth of the Saviour who forever changed this planet. Christmas is about serving, about driving the extra trips to move someone into their new home, it's about loving and encouraging new members to our community, and serving when called upon.
When everything seems to be going astray and I feel as though I could literally pull my hair out, and I've missed lunch yet again I am reminded to stop and pray and just breathe. And guess what, the hives even went away :)

Edit: I was reminded of this amazing song this morning and hope it can speak to you too:
Before the throne of God above
I have a strong and perfect plea,
A great high Priest whose Name is Love,
Who ever lives and pleads for me.
My name is graven on His hands,
My name is written on His heart.
I know that while in heaven He stands
No tongue can bid me thence depart,
No tongue can bid me thence depart.

When Satan tempts me to despair
And tells me of the guilt within,
Upward I look and see Him there
Who made an end to all my sin.
Because the sinless Savior died
My sinful soul is counted free,
For God, the Just, is satisfied
To look on Him and pardon me,
To look on Him and pardon me.

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